I am so flipping frustrated with my stupid body. I do believe I have the hypothalamic amenorrhea kicked. What I don't have kicked is totally irregular cycles. I have had a visit from the crimson bitch twice since I stopped BFing. The first time was four days after I ovulated, right as BFing ended. The second was 29 days later - 8 days after a CD21 O. I remember having had somewhat long cycles back from when I was a teenager, before any birth control, so I figured, okay, I'm going to O on around CD21... slightly longer than normal, but I can manage that.
So then we decide we're ready to ttc again. I should have known that was a recipe for my body going haywire. I started having EWCM on CD 8 this cycle. I was totally surprised - pleasantly so, thinking that maybe I'd actually O around CD14 and be normal. That dried up a couple of days later. No big deal.
Then it started again, CD13 this time. At this point, my 'no temping no OPKing' idea went out of the window. I was obsessing way more about whether I was going to O or not that I would using those things. So I started charting. This round of EW lasted for three days, then dried up again. So much for a normal length cycle.
Third time's the charm, right? My latest round of EW started on Monday, that's FIVE days ago - and still no positive OPK. Nor a temp rise, so it's not as if I O'ed and just didn't catch the surge. I am currently CD24, with no end in sight.
When I got pregnant with Ant, I O'ed on CD42. I thought, at the time, that it was so late because it was my first natural cycle in oh, forever. Now I'm rethinking that. Perhaps that is normal for me? I *wish* that I had paid attention when I was a teenager so I'd have a better idea of what to expect now.
I had set my baseline expectation at CD21 based on last cycle, but perhaps I should not anticipate O'ing until CD42 and then I'll feel less frustrated. I just wish I knew what was going on with all this egg-white. I'm almost getting to the point where I want to call my RE and see if I can go in for an u/s just to see what things are looking like inside. Do I have a decent sized follicle, that I could just take a trigger shot for? Or am I trundling along, follicle-less, and my hypothalamus is just playing tricks on me?
Damn, I *hate* not being in control, not knowing what is going on.