I'm knee-deep (maybe more like neck-deep) in working on my book on hypothalamic amenorrhea recovery; currently working on chapter 23 out of 30, so getting closer and closer...*huge grin*.
A couple of months ago I noticed that I was feeling HA-like symptoms again, despite cycling regularly ever since I weaned baby #3 about a year ago. I do a lot of work late at night, and I was constantly feeling cold, having to get a sweater to put on, despite keeping the house at a fairly balmy 70 degrees.
My scale broke a while ago and I never bothered to replace it, so I had no idea how much I weighed. I did a quick check at the gym one day (I am currently spending 45 minutes a week there, while #2 has his gymnastics class) and was surprised (and yet not) to find that I was at a mere 124lbs. That is pretty much what my weight was when I was at the height of HA - I dropped to 120 for about five seconds, but 124 was my stable weight.
Things are VERY different now than my HA days - I eat whatever I feel like and get a total of about two hours of high intensity exercise a week (writing a book is not conducive to exercise!) as opposed to limiting myself to 1500 calories with 2-3 hours of daily exercise.
But, between my weight being lower than I expected and feeling cold all the time (and hungry at night too), I was clearly not eating enough. So I added ice cream, bigger portions, whole milk to my cocoa (which has become my new addiction) and weighed myself about a month later, back up to my standard of 128. Whew.
Today I hopped on the scale again, another six or so weeks later, and now up to 132. My initial reaction was, "gulp", but then as I thought about it more, A) I'm nice and toasty warm, I've been in short sleeves the last few nights - and the temperature in the house has been exactly the same, B) I'm not nearly as hungry in the evenings, and C) I'm not even noticing my clothes fitting differently, and D) my cycle is MUCH more normal (back to a nice 12-day LP). So who the heck cares? On top of all the other positives, I actually think my face looks a bit fuller = fewer lines = younger so there's that too.
I'll take it!
5 comments:
Love this attitude. :)
You're amazeballs :)
Love this! Such a good reminder!
"I'm nice and toasty warm, I've been in short sleeves the last few nights - and the temperature in the house has been exactly the same, B) I'm not nearly as hungry in the evenings, and C) I'm not even noticing my clothes fitting differently"
- SAYS IT ALL!! In a total nutshell. Thank you so much for sharing all of this. I am another one of these girls who has progressed from anguish + confusion to being willing to understand my body and become more intuitive. The 'weight gain' is literally weight; - not size. The weight is not going to show. It's all of the inner, hidden muscles + tissues that wore away in the past. It's the padding to your bones. It is vital. It is your frame. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for this! I've really been struggling with my 15 pound weight increase over the past four months. I'm still waiting for my period to return. But I know what you mean about not feeling cold anymore. I walk around the house very warm, while my husband is the one cold now. We've reversed roles, so funny!
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